AML Round #2

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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Remembering Lee Ann Lapsky (4/8/10)


Remembering Lee Ann Lapsky


I am at a loss for words. Steve and Lee have been passing friends of mine for many years but it's the last few months that have opened my eyes to what an amazing strong jewel miss Lee has been. She was dignosed with lung cancer last summer, I hadnt been a large part in their lives but by fate and grace I was able to spend a lot of time at the hospital fighting my battle while Lee was there fighting her's. The incredible strength and grace that Lee exhuded kept me going everyday. I am so very blessed to have been able to spend that time to get to know her. She, in her selflessness, joked and kidded with me about our bad hair days and all the crap cancer has thrown at us.

I know that she is in a peaceful place, and for that I am so grateful, she was in so very much pain. I just wish there was something I could do to bring more honor and acknoledgment to her fight.

Hold your loved ones tight, love them like there is no tomorrow and pray that just 1 person is spared the pain this woman went through.

I will miss you my friend!!!

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Hair today gone tomorrow




I am so very frustrated with the hair situation right now.  When I was first dignosed with AML in Dec 09 I elected to shave my head... the thought of waking up every morning to shoulder length clasps of hair in my bed depressed me greatly, the thought of gobbs of down my back hair clogging up the shower still turns my stomach.  So I just got rid of it ALL, at the time I had a very one track mind and didnt think about donation tho through my recent readings they probably wouldnt have taken it anyway since I dyed my hair..... I had infact paid $100 for a wash cut, color, style, and wax.... what a waste of money ROFL.
So here I am on day 1 of my new induction chemo round and I really want to do something more productive with my hair this time......BUT I have searched and searched and searched I can not find a place that will take donations of shorter hair.  Mine is between 5"-7" depending on where, I have not cut a snip off of it since I shaved it that fateful day. 
This is my desire.  I want to cut it in some style of buzz cut, pretty short but not skin bald and then dye it some crazy color, I am not sure what yet but I am leaning towards orange since it's for leukemia awareness.... crazy I know that I just think it would be so fun and funny to show up at Emory like that.  DH has told me that if I do that he wont go out in public with me.... that party pooper






Monday, June 6, 2011

Bad news travels fast....

This was suspose to be my 1 year remission anniversary on June 2nd but things didnt go quite like that....



I am pretty sure that I have contacted just about everyone besided my kindergarden teacher and the next door neighbor I had when I was 3. But for those who keep up through this source I will share all the dark and devistating news of the week.


The short version is that I found out at 4pm Friday 6/3 that I have relapes and will be needing a bone marrow transplant after all......



The long version. Tho I have been suffering ups and downs with my health this past year things have been going pretty well. When I went for my monthly blood work in April Dr Nic noted and told me that my white count was somewhat low. He asked if I had been sick and tho I have many cronic issues I hadnt had any real illness, he shrugged it off and sure enough about a week later I got a sinus infection/ear infection cruddy stuff. So thinking that was the cause of the bad count we proceeded with my normal monthly appt. I went in on May 17th and my white count was even lower than before, to the point of being dangerously low now. He started to seem concerned and decided to have me come back in 2 weeks and be rechecked since it just wasnt making sense. Well on Tues May 31st I went in and things had just begun to bottom out, my WBC is below 2, my ANC is 0.5 (normal value is over 1000) and my Hem count which had maintained a steady 14.9 for 11 and 1/2 months was down to 10. Nic scheduled me for a STAT bone marrow biopsy on 6/1 which was miserable but not worth going into... I got the call last thing Friday that the results show that the AML has returned. A bone marrow biopsy after high dose chemo and possibly raditation is the only treatment... there are lots of decisions and plans to be made. I am not sure what source I will use to keep people updated but I will be with my computer throughout my new journey with the devil AML much love and prayers to all my beloved friends and family

Friday, June 3, 2011

Remembering Hailey....


This picture is very special to me, not only is a picture of one of the strongest most resilient women I have ever met (besides my Mom who died of breast cancer on her 51st birthday in 1998) but this is a picture of one of my guardian angels.
I have a very emotional story attached to this specific picture.  During my induction chemo in Dec of 09/ Jan of 2010 I met this amazing woman in the oncology ward at ARMC.  We had rooms across the hall from each other and on our good days we would visit, talk share stories of our families and daughters.  Her husband was one of those very special individuals that truly knows how to be a caregiver to this horrible disease, not only was he there for Hailey there were several times where his kindness was outstretched towards me.  A piece of pizza or a bag of candy his attention when so far toward the soothing of my hurting heart and spirit during one of the darkest times of my life thus far.
But that is not all.  2 very short days after I was released to come home after my induction chemo I found myself back in the ER with severe complications, neurological problems, unbelievable pain and discomfort that resulted in a partially delusional state.  After several hours in the ER they decided that I was too sick to return home and they admitted me back into the oncology ward.  Shortly after arriving in the room I noticed this picture of Hailey and James sitting on the wall in front of my bed... at the time my mind was not clear and some how I had convinced myself that she had gone on to Heaven and had left her image there to look over me.  I spent that whole night laying on my side shaking uncontrollably from the neurological side effects of the poison chemo staring at this picture of this beautiful amazing strong woman who had so touched my soul.  After much pain management and several hours of sleep I was finally able to articulate my concerns to the nurse to learn that Hailey had been released to go home a few hours before I had been admitted to the same room and she had simply forgotten her picture....that night forever changed me and over the next year and a half Haily and I spent several more visits in the oncology ward together and we both have had our highs and lows.... I am so very grief stricken to share that Heaven gained another angel this week....

Hailey Rochelle Gill of Jefferson, who was diagnosed in June 2008 with peripheral nerve sheath sarcoma, a rare cancer of the connective tissue that surrounds the nerves, died Saturday from complications of the disease at Athens Regional Medical Center. She was 32

You will forever live in the hearts of those who loved you... me included!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

The ugly evil needle and the wait................


Our friends at WebMD tell us

A bone marrow biopsy removes a small amount of bone and a small amount of fluid and cells from inside the bone (bone marrow). A bone marrow aspiration removes only the marrow. These tests are often done to find the reason for many blood disorders and may be used to find out if cancer or infection has spread to the bone marrow.


Bone marrow aspiration removes a small amount of bone marrow fluid and cells through a needle put into a bone. The bone marrow fluid and cells are checked for problems with any of the blood cells made in the bone marrow. Cells can be checked for chromosome problems. Cultures can also be done to look for infection.

A bone marrow biopsy removes bone with the marrow inside to look at under a microscope. The aspiration (taking fluid) is usually done first, and then the biopsy.

And thanks to my wonderful disagreable bones I get the pleasure of doing a CT guided biopsy with Procedural sedation. This  is defined as "a technique of administering sedatives or dissociative agents with or without analgesics to induce a state that allows the patient to tolerate unpleasant procedures while maintaining cardiorespiratory function."[1] It was previously referred to as conscious sedation"

Unfortunatly in about 1/2 the times the medications used do not work for me and I end up in severe pain and "grinning and baring it while they hammer that needle in.......as was today......
and so the wait beings, every cancer patients least favorite time.... the waits are torture.

Tomorrow should be my 1 year anniversary of Remission...... wait......







Saturday, May 14, 2011

Spring has sprung.....

 How the heck did she get so big?!


My baby isnt a baby anymore.  I know this post was suspose to be a recent picture of me and I have included one at the end but I would much rather spend time posting pictures of my beautiful child than trying to explain how I am gaining lbs as fast as my hair is growing back LOL
The photos were from our yearly May visit with my Dad and StepMom... Sarai was SO good and well behaved.  We went out to eat and she was a lady all afternoon!!!





The BC and AC of it all (The explanation for this blog, and its title)

I was reading another survivors blog this week and she talked about the line that we draw so deep in our lives separating the time BC (before cancer) and AC (after cancer).  Reading what she wrote really struck a cord with me cause it's true... cancer changes you... sometimes for better sometimes for worse but you are NEVER gonna be the same.
I have always and will always be a writter.  It's a way for me to get things out and purge my soul of unrest and strife.  BC I always thought about blogging but never figured I was good enough to attract readership or attention from many people.  But now it's not about that anymore.  I started my carepage ( see here ) a few weeks into my induction treatment in Dec of 2009 and after months of updating my page with my current medical junk I decided I wanted something more expressive, something I could design and alter as the mood struck me.  Thus Leukemia and Laffy Taffy was born.
For those precious few who dont get the name.  In Feb of 2010 in the throws of my horrible rounds of chemo my delightful daughter brought home a bag of Valentine candy.  In this bag was a piece of strawberry laffy taffy, now mind you I dont even usuallly like strawberry candy. I got such a HUGE relief from my mouth sores and the aweful taste that chemo leaves in you mouth that I was hooked.  In the following weeks and months I went through bags and bags of laffy taffy... some of which was sent from as far away as NV as a gift from a dear dear friend and Mother from my teenage years.  I know that writting in this has not become a habit for me that it probably should but when I get down to it, it always makes me feel better!!! Much love

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Intro to me (Part Two...Cancer)

As I mentioned before I had a dilusion that being dignosed with Cancer things would change, bridges would be built issues would be resolved.  This was so far from the cold hard truth.  Cancer makes live crude, real, brutal, and sometimes very overwhelming.  It can bring out horrible traits in others that before they might have been able to hide.
I witnessed the remained of the breakdown of our family unit as I struggled and suffered endless chemo, pain, testing, and trials of despritly attempting to maintain my life.  I learned that my husband "doesnt do illness" I became very isolated and drepressed I was shut off from the very people I needed to have by my side.
Through God's grace the wonderful woman who were there for me during my pregnancy struggles they rallied around me and were my main stay and my life through all of my horrible cancer journey. 

The line in the sand was drawn midway thought treatment when P told me "Im only still doing this becasuse you have cancer".  I had an apifiny that night.... I know it will take a lot of work and a lot of time but I am not going to flounder in a miserable relationship where when I needed my partner the most he let me down in everyway.....lots of changes to come.....
just so very sad that Cancer broke us upart instead of bring us together....


Intro of Me (my life as it is now) Part One (before cancer).....

On the surface a topic like this should seem easy to cover.  Something I should be able to sum up in a paragraph or two but as true with so many things in order to understand the present you must also explore the past.....

Today

As of today I am a 35 year old mother of a 3 year 9 month old little girl a the partner co-habitant/wife for the past 10 years to P. I am 14+ months into the most eye opening trama of my life, AML Leukemia. More has changed in the last year of my life than in all other years combined.  I am at a precairous crossroads right now with many big decisions to make not knowing if when they will need to be made.

Backstory
Here comes to the part that I feel nothing that is going on now will make sense unless you first hear how we got to this point to begin with.  I had this misguided delusion that Cancer would fix the problems I have in my life, that those around me would see the fraility of life and make concerted efforts to right wrongs and make the most of "the time we have left".  I couldnt have been further from the truth. 
Mine and P's relationship and marrige started out promising.  We had the normal adjustmets that couples make when they go from fending for themselves to thinking about others in day to day activities and life.  P came along in my life when I was really ready to settle down, I had made up my mind I wanted to be married (not that the opportunity hadnt been there in the past) and he was most of the things I felt I wanted and needed in a life partner. My only real reservation was his lack of affection and emotion and me feeling like I wasnt as important to him as I should be (had I known what I know now that would have been a big red flag) . The first 2 years of our relationship and 2 of marriage went by pretty smoothly.  Any fights that were had were superficial and about stuff like not spending enough time with me.... silly stuff. I always drew comfort in the fact tht our intimate life was good and tho he had issues with verbal emotions and showing casual affection we were still intimate on a good basis so that must mean things were ok.
At this point in time we felt that it was time to start thinking about having a baby, and tho I had been off birth control for 3 years it didnt just happen on it's own for us.  So in the Spring of 2004 I did some parental planning reading and by June we had our first sucessful pregnancy, only to have it quickly end with a spontanious miscarrage at 6 weeks.  This is a side note to it all but I had been pregnant once before meeting P so we knew I was ABLE to.  As shocking and devisating as it was I got pregnant again right away and this time things seemed to be going better.  They checked my HcG pregnancy hormones several times over the first few week and things looked great.  At 9 weeks we went in for our first ultrasound.  The tech was immediatly nervous and uncomforable.  She left the room to get the doctor and returned, we were told that the baby did not have a heartbeat and that I would have to have a procedure called a D&C because my body had not recognized that the pregnancy was not viable.  This goes down as one of the worst days of my life; the whole experience the doctor's cold attitude, the hospital trip and complications just broke our hearts.....but it set inside of me a mission, a quest and obsession that I would over come what ever hurtles thrown forth I would have a child, my child......
I spent many many months countless hours reading up on fertality issues, conception thories, trying different herbal remidies, doing all sorts of body temping charts, ovulation kits you name it I did it. During this time I had 2 more early miscarriages at ~6 weeks. 
All of this took a tole on our marriage... I dont think he'd ever admit it but I think P was fine with not having anymore children.  He has a daughter by another marriage and I think he would  have been pefectly fine with that.  The stress of my obession spowned some resentment with him because I was always the one demanding.... and getting very upset when he's try to get out of it.... I think he did that more than he needed to.
Finally after almost 4 years, 4 miscarriages and several doctors we got sucessful!!! They never really discovered what was wrong but they put me on progestrogen suppliments from conception to 14w gestation to ensure the baby was developing correctly! 
I was not a "good pregnant" woman, I didnt really bask in the glow and  enjoy all the ins and outs of pregnancy tho I was very excited....and scared, any Mom who'd had a miscarrage carries that fear with her sometimes irrationally but it's there. 
At about 32w things started getting pretty scary.  I developed pre-eclampsia (a life thretening condition that causes elevated blood pressure, decreased kidney functions and can cause sezures in the mother possibly damaging or killing the child).  I was hospitlized for 5 days and then told that I needed to be on bed rest for the remainder of my pregnancy....the only other alternative was to have a c-section then and she would have been VERY premature.  I really didnt want that for her so I promised to be good, promised to stay on bedrest and try to keep her put at long as possible.
During this time I started having serious GI pain, not a day would go by that I would suffer from severe reflux and vomiting.  After several trips to the OB they just kept blowing it off as me being large and at the end of my pregnancy to just suck it up and it will be over when I deliver Sarai.
June 10th 2007 the big day arrives.  I was admitted the night before and induction began.  That night an most of the morning till the epidural was miserable but once I was numb things were great.  We had one HUGE scare where my heartrate dropped into the 50's/30's and Sarai flatlined for a few seconds but our great nurses pushed meds and fix all that before any of us really realized what was going on.
Sarai makes her arrivial in a short 7 mins of pushing and all seems fine for the moment.....I asked the nurse for a coke cause I hadnt had anything in going on 20 hrs... by the time she returned the epidural had worn off in my chest area and I was screaming in the worst pain of my entire life....all I could tell them is that I was having chest pains and pleading with Jesus to make it stop.  They rushed me for an EKG of my heart and gave me some magnesum sulfate to lower my BP, then rushed me for a CT scan.  Turned out I had SEVERE pancretitus... some of the worst he'd ever seen accourding to my GI doc later.
So after a 3 day stay I was sent reluctantly home, they didnt want me to leave but they were kickin Sarai out and I didnt want her to go home without me. Hindsite this was a bad decision cause once home I got much worse, I swelled horribly because my kidneys wern't functioning and the pain was so extreme.  I made it 2 days and was readmitted where I spend another 14 days in the hospital.  I missed out on precious caring for and bonding time with Sarai during those precious first days.  It took a while and I had to fight through some post partum depression but by Sept I was able to go back to work. 
Things were better with me but it was obvious that  P still held a lot of resentment, resentment for the way he was "treated' when I was so obsessed with having a child and then resentment with me because he had to give up free time activities because my job had long hours and lots of weekend work.  We had stopped sharing a room before Sarai was born, he says because our sleeping habits are too divergant but I think that's just a load of BS. 
Patrick has a real issue with divisionn of labor when it comes to Sarai's care he holds onto the attitude that "you're the one that wanted a child so you need to be the one that cares for her"  We do a lot of segregated parenting....he refuses to back me up when I disipline Sarai he just ignores it instead of taking my side and re-enforcing what I say. 
During this time the business that we'd owned and he kept up took some nasty hits because of the decline in the housing market and it became obvious that for us to keep paying bills he'd have to find a consistant job; So I got him a job this turned into another resentment....him taking it from me and him making less money than me.....so the resentment builts. 
During this time our relationship essentially crumbled....intimacy became infrequent and miserable.  Any form of affection ceased and really the desire to even be around eachother deminished....
During the summer of 2009 we thought we got the breaks that would get us back on track.  The company we both worked for offered us new jobs and a transfer to south GA, on paper it seemed like a dream come true.... good jobs, good pay, lots of perks like a free condo till we could sell our house and find a new one..... the works.... P left first for training in April and May and by June all 3 of us were down there full time
Disaster of a whole other sort hits!!!!!!!!!  Not a month down there and they decide P isnt going to work out....we pack up our whole lives, make this big leap of faith and they wash their hands of him in a mere 4 weeks.  The salt in the wound is the one person that couldnt get along wtih P was still my boss and decided to make things a living hell for me so I had to walk away. And this was the last time (July 5th 2009) that I was held or comforted in any way by my husband.  Thankfully the company knew my record with them and allowed me to transfer and take another position doing what I had been doing before tho it was a bit further from home.  It was obvious that I had to leave this company and find a new job because of what they did to P so in October of 2009 I went back to work for a company I worked for 10 years previous only to find out on December 23th that I have AML leukemia......









.....


Friday, March 11, 2011

Twice stolen blog challenge....

I came across a post on a good friend's blog, read it here , she had borrowed the idea from another friend on how to get in the habit of posting and adding quality to your blog entries.... so I have decided to take the 30 day challenge... hope this gives my friends and loved ones some insite into who I am now and allows me to sort and explore some of my intermost thoughts and desires..... so here is the list of upcoming posts

1.Intro about me (as my life is now).


2.The explanation for this blog, and its title.

3.A recent photo of me, and explanation of why I picked that photo.

4.My family explored.

5.My friends explained.

6.My saddest memory.

7.My happiest memory.

8.Life's biggest challenge so far.

9.A book that has had an impact on my life.

10.My hopes for this new year.

11.Something I've lost that I really miss.

12.My favorite trait about myself.

13.My least favorite trait about myself.

14.My favorite color, and why.

15.What would I do with a million dollars?

16.My favorite season, and why.

17.The hardest thing about being a mom.

18.The best thing about being a mom.

19.What I watched on TV the night before.

20.The charity/foundation that means the most to me, and why.

21.What I think the meaning of my life is (so far).

22.My favorite cartoon as a child.

23.My thoughts on religion and God.

24.My favorite piece of art.

25.A song that makes me cry.

26.Something that always makes me smile.

27.My favorite vacation.

28.If I had 3 wishes...

29.A picture of something that makes me happy.

30.My goals for the future.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Just because I have cancer doesnt make me a bad mother....



I have been dealing with a lot of guilt lately.  Some self induced and some inflicted by others around me.  BC (before cancer) I worked a very full time job, 60-80hrs a week sometimes sacrificing nights and weekends off for the sake of the job.  Cancer brought all of this to a screeching hault and replaced it with 168 days in the hospital in less than six months.  Short trips home when even then I was too sick to do much more than lay in bed and pray that my active interested inquisitive 3 year old would snuggle and love on me.
Cancer has been really hard on my little girl too.  Tho on the surfice she seems to have taken things in stride, just mention of the doctor or the hospital peeks her anxiety and she starts in saying "Momma please dont go, no more hospitals no more doctors"  When I am having a down day, like us recovering from chemo seem to have, she is very senistive patting me and worrying telling others to shush cause her mommy isnt feeling well.  A bruise on my arm send her into high allert of pats and kisses and mommy are you oks.
It really hurts to see my child worry like this, she shouldnt have to even understand the concept of a serious illness much less have to live with it.  It makes me cry to think of the fear and uncertainaty I have caused her.... She is at that age that she wants to know but cant understand.....
I try to tell her that things are ok, that Mommy is alright and the doctors are all working very hard to keep her alright,,, breaks my heart that I have brought these fears and insecurties into her life
As a parent it's our dream our job to allow our beautiful innocent children are able to remain that way as long as possible....to enjoy their youth and their blissful ignorance of the sadness and darkness that abounds in this world.....wish she didnt have to see, wish she didnt have to know......
She is my world, she is my life, she is my heart, she is my breath without her I am nothing.....


Sunday, February 27, 2011

Why I really dont like weekends....

I am sure at some point or another my friends have wondered why I am always so "anti' weekend when it comes to my status updates and comments.  To be honest I feel pretty bad about it but the weekends just wear me out and by Sunday night I am sore tired and in a bad mood.  I do fine during the week but my threshhold is about 4 hours when it comes to running, being jumped on, body slammed, hit, kicked, pounced on, and in general beaten up.... after that I am ill and ready to take a nap or a hot shower or just simply grab my car keys and run... I know this isnt Sarai's fault she's 3 and 1/2  it's more the OTHER half's fault.. it's him that doesnt help or give me a break or pick up the slack so to speak.  UGHHHH 



Wednesday, February 23, 2011

14th month oncology check-up....

I went in to see Dr. Nic yesterday.  As you may have read in my previous post see here I called and moved my appointment up by a week because I have been feeling so fatigued. 
Well the incredible news is that all my "leukemia signs" are great... my white and red counts are perfect and tho a little low my platelets are good too.
The frustrating news is that I still have two types of anemia: Megloblastic and Hemolytic... I wanted to research these before posting so I could explain them in normal english.  Essentially megloblastic anemia is linked to B12 deficiancy, I am still unsure as to if taking a suppliment will work for this, we are going to try one month of oral B12 and then go to injections if that doesnt work.  Hemolytic anemia is where the red blood cells are deformed and/or broken in some way, this can be a product of the chemo and also of cronic pancreatitus (which can also cause the megloblastic kind) so I am double down with this.  On the flip side my body has excess iron, for some unknown reason it's there but it's not being absorbed and used like iron should be.  So with all this in play my fatigue and ill feeling are completely understandable.
Dr. Nic was very anxious yesterday, he told me that this is a time of "high alert" that between now and my one year aniversary in June he will be watching extra close for signs of relapse.
I was a little disapointed because I thought that I had already hit my 1 year milestone (thinking they were basing the year on dignosis not point of remission) but what's a few months right?!
If you'd like to see pics from my journey with AML please check out my previous post . I spent several hours on it only to have it pushed to back pages when I posted new entries.....
much love and prayers to those who keep up with me and lift me up in their hearts and prayers!! 

Monday, February 21, 2011

For my most precious Saraibear....





Just the way you are by: Bruno Mars

Oh her eyes, her eyes

Make the stars look like they're not shining

Her hair, her hair

Falls perfectly without her trying

She's so beautiful

And I tell her every day

Yeah I know, I know

When I compliment her

She wont believe me

And its so, its so

Sad to think she don't see what I see

But every time she asks me do I look okay

I say

When I see your face

There's not a thing that I would change

Cause you're amazing

Just the way you are

And when you smile,

The whole world stops and stares for awhile

Cause girl you're amazing

Just the way you are

Her nails, her nails

I could kiss them all day if she'd let me

Her laugh, her laugh

She hates but I think its so sexy

She's so beautiful

And I tell her every day

Oh you know, you know, you know

Id never ask you to change

If perfect is what you're searching for

Then just stay the same

So don't even bother asking

If you look okay

You know I say

When I see your face

There's not a thing that I would change

Cause you're amazing

Just the way you are

And when you smile,

The whole world stops and stares for awhile

Cause girl you're amazing

Just the way you are

The way you are

The way you are

Girl you're amazing

Just the way you are

When I see your face

There's not a thing that I would change

Cause you're amazing

Just the way you are

And when you smile,

The whole world stops and stares for awhile

Cause girl you're amazing

Just the way you are






Winter photos

Worries and Medical update


I wanted to post an upate on the medical front today. For those of you that keep up with me you know that Feb. has been a tough month for me.  It all started with a cold brought home from daycare in late Jan. that turned into pneumonia and some other respratory issues.  I spent a night in the hosptial and 21 days on medication.  I have been off of all sickness related meds for about 10 days now.  I called Dr. Nic's office last week because so many of the things I am feeling now are mirroring what I delt with in Dec 2009 when I was dignosed.  I am EXHAUSTED to the point of being unable to keep myself awake at times, I have been having reoccuring abdomnal pain, horrible bruises, dizziness, headaches and general feeling of illness. So I figured why wait, call get it over with and make sure nothing else is going on.  So here I am on the 14th month milestone of my dignosis I will see Nic tomorrow, have blood work done and find out if I am still keeping the monster at bay.......

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Wanted to share my Year in review of AML photos


As I was working on updating this blog and rearranging my pictures on my computer today I came across several pictures I have taken of Sarai and I during the past 14 months of my treatments, thought it would be interesting to see them all lined up......


12.11.09 Showing off my new do

12.18.09 St Mary's after 4 blood tranfustions, still didnt know it was AML




12.28.09 admission day for chemo



12.29.09 showing off my port cath (day 2)

01.06.10 post induction (new do)

01.08.10 better shot of the new do

2.26.10  2nd round of chemo

03.01.10 going home after 2nd chemo

03.12.10 back in hossie 5th stay, sick

04.01.10 after 6th stay going home

04.13.10 4th round of chemo

04.17.10 going home after 8th stay, sick

05.07.10 start of 5th round 9th hospital stay

05.11.10 end of 5th and final round!!

05.15.10 post chemo enjoying the sun

05.27.10 home from 10th hospital stay


06.11.10 1 month post chemo 1 week post BMB REMISSION

06.18.10 my baby girl turned 3!!

07.11.10 2 months post chemo

09.21.10 4 months post chemo

10.31.10  5 1/2 months post chemo

11.08.10 6 months post chemo

02.07.11 9 months post chemo





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